


See

by SlothOtter



Category: GOT7, JJ Project
Genre: Disabled Character, Fluff, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, sliiiiight angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-11
Updated: 2017-04-11
Packaged: 2018-10-17 16:12:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10597581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SlothOtter/pseuds/SlothOtter
Summary: It's never about how to see the world but how you view it.





	

**Author's Note:**

> A supposed to be short bug ended up as a mess story written in math class because i hate math.

See 

Hearing the childish hiccupping laughter and the slip of dialect of his when irritated or angry, perceive the shift of the atmosphere based on his tone. Usually snarky and sarcastic when slightly put off, flirty and sassy when teasing around, calm and sincere when serious, small and weak when uncertain. Enjoying the silence keeping them in despite his need of sound, his body always seeking to hear for it to know, always ears on alert.  
\-----  
He used to find solace in lone walks to the park, capturing images his subconscious could never comprehend, colors he learned to say but never understand, shapes only his hands gave life to. Mind never processing the lights and colors to build up an image.

 

He was used to the regular bumps and accidents, always tiny blues here and there in his legs and arms. Used to playing it confident about his directions only to ask the clerks, assitants, passerby's to show him the way if the sounds got too much for his sensitive ears.

Being ticked off by the lack of Braille books and signs leaving him to use robotic voice assistants or listening to an audio book the reader never catching up the feeling of it.

He always lived in darkness, even his dreams were drowned in it, but he doesn't even know what darkness is and how to explain it. He only knew that he is ignorant of how the world look like, how he looks like, everything is an abstract image his mind made to relate it to everyday work.

In fact, despite all the inconveniences he wouldn't wish for anything to change. Yes he would want to see at least once, but that would lead to a massive headache and he wouldn't understand what he would see, he might be disappointed by what he would see and that's why he is satisfied with who he is. Even if there is that small voice deep down telling him how he is undesireable and the people who are with him are just there because he is a pity case.

Then, during his impromptu walks at god knows when snapping pictures of whatever his instincts told him to stop and press the shutter that he met "Him".  
Tired and cold from the walk he found a bench, luckly it didn't rain, he sat there taking in the cold breeze and enjoying the silence. For once not noticing the person sitting on the other side of the bench.

If it weren't for the wind catching him off guard sending the small sniffling sounds to his direction with an added rustling of clothes being hit by the wind other than his, he wouldn't notcie the presence of the human next to him.

"Here" he handed a soft small handkerchief he knitted himself to the person recieving an equally soft and small "thank you" in return.

After a still moment, the sniffles turned into small hiccups then full blown sobs.

He could only listen, take in the sorrowful sounds of the raspy man near him.

"...i hope you have hit rock bottom because the only way would be up and life would be much easier on you later." He found himself saying, he didn't mean to but it was the only thing he could think of.

A cold laugh void of any livelihood came on "i doubt it. I will sink in the abyss, i sometimes wonder why i am still here, living...miserable." a self depricating chuckle followed. "I would be better off dead and no one would care".

"How could you." He replied, tone reprimanding. "No human should say this to themselves. If you think your soul is worth noth then you should re-evaluate all your life up until this moment." He finished slightly irritated.

"What does that mean?" The crying man sounded put off.  
But he couldn't stop. Not when he heard him like this, not when he found him sitting here in the cold at the crack of dawn based on the background chrips of waking birds getting ready to feed themselves.

"I don't know what you have been through in your life. But what seems like that you have lost confidence in yourself and the will to continue to live on shouldn't be a reason to end it prematurely. Not when there must have been bright memories in your lifetime, moments you stopped at just to take them in,carve them in your memory, to value the beautiful image in front of you " he pointed in front of him, where the sun started rising above the river, the play of red, orange, and yellow fading in the dark blue veil of the night indicating the beginning of a new day. " a person like you, with a voice like yours would be a waste if it were to cease existing in this world." He finished looking at the direction of the quieted down sniffles.

Brows furrowed upon forcing his eyes open, white orbs darting from side to side until landing on the opposit dark seeing ones. All gazing deep down them.

\-----

Getting used to the cheerful warm bubbly laughter, the lively chatter, the nervous fragile chuckles after showing too much of themselves.  
Listening to the fond sarcastic tone and sassy retorts directed to him upon having a petty argument over the choice of a cactus pot.  
"You clearly don't SEE how ugly this pot is"  
"But i clearly SEE you smiling and buying it." He would laugh catching him already checking in the pot for their cactus.

 

Hearing the uncertain broken whispers at night coming from the direction of the door.  
"Jaebum...are you awake?"  
Followed by hesitant footsteps towards him, then the familiar dip in the bed and the shuffling of bedsheets until he could feel a warm body flushed behind him, shakey hands snaked around his chest.

He would hum and lean in on the chest behind him, feel the irratic fast heartbeat of his lover. Indicating the state he were in that moment.

Heart beat slowing down after streched hours in the night of them spilling in their inner trumoils, Jaebum now facing him hands cupping tear staned cheeks and thumbs ghosting over soft parted lips and fluttering wet eyelashes.  
"i love seeing you like this with me Jinyoungie" he would whisper chuckling along with a giggling Jinyoung that would tighten his graps over his waist telling him " the lights are off, silly"

 

The amount of inconvenient accidents decreased drastically which he was really thankfull for.  
"I am clumsy in nature, not being able to see the impending stupid accident really irks me." He would say after he would trip over his steps, blushing and laughing at hi own actions.  
He now doesn't need a monotonous voice assitant as he has a "oscar worthy asmr voice award even exist. You should become the next morgan freeman if you voice acted..." he would say but then furrow his brows and shake his head "no, then i wouldn't be able to have you all to myself" and would hug Jinyoung closer to him.

He now no longer finds solace in lone impromptu walks at ungodly hours "hey, time is not real. Only society made it to force you to work at defined times of the day where you should be sleeping." He would defend himself after fishing out their apartment keys to take a walk at 3 am. Now there is a hand in his guiding him through life, the other would help him not "stop taking close up shots of my nose!" And instead actually get "wow, how can you capture such pictures..." a breathless Jinyoung would say after they lay down on the grass and would take the camera away to clean all the booty shots jaebum has taken of him.  
"If only you could see how beautiful these pictures are" he says after looking at each one of them, catching in Jaebum's feelings and instincts at the moment that shot was taken.

 

Now the silence he grew used to when living alone was accompanied with a warm body next to him on the couch, his hands and mind already traced all of it. Memorising each and every dip and curve of his, each patch of fading scars and slight bumps of moles he gives extra kisses to, a tempretature a constant reminder that Jinyoung will always be here next to him. A body part his hand always searches to grab and pull Jinyoung closer to him.

\-----

Despite the small voice deep down telling him if only he could put a face to the human he promised a lifetime to, Jinyoung would always reassure him after noticing the slightly excessive blind jokes and puns Jaebum would say when he is a little bit self conscious of his disability that he would never ever have Jaebum any other way than the Jaebum he has now, and that sight is only a mean to understand the world better "but you know much more, your vision is much ambitious" and would tell him "If you want to you could, if you can't then don't." About Jaebum's constant "what if i can see one day?" questions. Then he would go on "next time,i will get my driving licence so that we can run off far away from society together" because he got tired of people's looks at them when boarding public transports.  
What is so alien about a blind person that gains him this much stares? What is so alien about two men holding hands that gets them disapproving looks?

He sometimes let it slip, his jealousy over Jaebum's ignorance of how ugly looking the world is after a long day at work dealing with corrupted people for hours on end.

He would walk to the couch where Jaebum lies at, hair messy and half sleeping. He would lean in to kiss jaebum's forehead, standing between the man's legs as he pours his anger when jaebum holds him still and lean his head over Jinyoung's tummy to tickle him down sitting on his lap.  
Jaebum would frown at Jinyoung's statements and would tell him " i am content with the way i am but i still want to see just how beautiful you are outside as you are to me on the inside, even if you have a third eye i would still find it beautiful." He would chuckle saying " i would be jealous knowing you could see more than me with my defected eyes tho." And he would pout, but then continues " i would still want to see the way you turn beetroot red when i hold you and make love to you, your red lips after i kiss them dearly, your whiskerd when you would laugh at me for coming too quickly calling me a grandpa" he would snicker along with jinyoung " i would still want to see your eyes that tell stories, to understand you better without words even if we rarely use them anymore i still want to see your beautiful scars and kiss them, thanking them for leading them you to me" he would open his eyes to look directly at Jinyoun's already tearing up ones.

They're as white and as defective as always but beautiful nonetheless Jinyoung thinks reaching his thumbs to trace them even after he see the furrow and the twitching and squinting of muscle indicating that Jaebum has reached his limits of opening his eyes.  
"We should use weights to strengthen your eye muscles." He says kissing both of Jaebum's eyes.  
"Why?"  
"Because i want to see them more often." He would kids him again.  
But jaebum pay they kisses littered on his face no heed as he continues " i want to understand the concept of colors and know that you truly are Red, Green, Blue and white as you described the colors to me, to take you to beautiful places we read about and see your beautiful smile, your whiskers , your crunched up nose as you laugh your heart out by how happy you are to be there,hopefully with me" he would finally close his eyes burrying his face under Jinyoung's chin taking in his natural scent.

He would whisper "no matter how ugly is the world that you tell me about there is always beauty in it. Somewhere hidden under the dirt of society's corruption. A beauty found only when you least expect it to be"

He would kiss Jinyoung's neck and say "if i didn't look at you that day i wouldn't have found the most beautiful gem in the world."

 

Jinyoung would kiss Jaebum and stand up to feed their three babies Jaebum had brought home one after another, still having two more on the waiting list for Jinyoung to approve of.  
\-----

 

"I can't imagine what PETA would do to us if you went blind suddenly and we fed our children dog food instead because companies don't care for blind people at all." He would laugh as he teaches Jinyoung Braille as precaution if they were both to be old grumpy blind men needing some books to read before they wither away and leaving five healthy cats sent to each and one of their friends.


End file.
